Gone

You never knew me.
Nor did I know you.
Yet, a noose of responsibility tightens,
Hurting my throat

When you bade farewell, with a letter to all
Vindicating each of them, except one…
It became sad news
But it’s more than news.

It’s a warrant.

Yesterday you left us all-
A stab at all of us self-righteous people
smiling, going shopping
going to church… all passing you by.

If your heart ached and I was too busy to find out,
Woe to me, and all you friends
Because a friend was placed beside you
So that you live
So that you are comforted
So that you could talk when you heart felt heavy
So that I could talk you out of doing
something stupid,
something worthless,
as this.

Child,
From far I hear of you.
In fact,
After you have gone.

God is a sword.
He said that himself.
He did not come to comfort me,
But to comfort people like you
and when he left this earth,
He put me or someone like me
Beside you
so that I could,
What He would.

Now that you’re gone
With my job undone
Unable to complete it, ever again
I await judgement.
I await that sword, which I dread.

My hands lifted in praise
Will merely be a posture now;
My rising voice will sound terrible
As I worship.
His face will be turned away
As I look for him.
Since I didn’t care for you,
He wouldn’t care for me.
That’s His logic. May be beyond that.

Why didn’t I pay heed to you?
Why didn’t I see those moist eyes when you laughed with us?
Why did I not think twice,
When I heard your voice go down as we shared coffee with friends?
How could I not see the soul behind those eyes!
And I call myself, a friend, or classmate,
Or neighbour

Now that you are gone…

Now that you are gone…

Does it mean there are more-
People, with swollen hearts
Dreams shattered
In to a million tiny pieces,
Carrying the world on their shoulders
While I sit beside and laugh
Carelessly. Literally, carelessly.

More than my punishment
I worry, that I couldn’t let you know
That you could just speak
Or just cry
and I would just listen.
I was busy making plans
Watching movies,
Learning songs,
Messaging the same friends
Over and over and over
Taking stupid tests on facebook
Updating my status,
Wondering what people said about them,
Thanking those who commented on my notes

While you, squeezed your heart in pain
Writhed in disgrace,
Shattered at the ungrateful cheat’s behaviour,
Sitting alone in the crowd
Withdrew to your room on a busy street
and finally gave up.

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2 thoughts on “Gone

  1. I don’t know what to say. Reading this kinda got me choked up.
    This is true for many of us. We pass by our lives thinking of “I, me and myself” all the time. Taking a break and looking around will surely help us recognise those that are in the dumps at that time.
    This surely reminded me to look around me for people I can reach out for, rather than shut myself in my own lil shell. Thanks for sharing this Georgy!!

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